Good Morning Lorie!

How interesting you should send this poem this morning (Crabby Old Man)... And how interesting I have a special friend in NE who is old now... A man of much land, cattle and money, a man who said go and people went, who said stay and people stayed... Yet now with no wife and 6 children whom have no time for him... No control over his life.. He is in a nursing home wanting to go home to spend his last days at his home.. I went there to help him last spring and that is when he had his stroke. He survived a stroke that the Dr said he would die from... Many times he has been brought to death's door and many times God has spared him. He knows God (a Catholic), but he didn't know Jesus. While I was there with him he said he saw Jesus... Thank you Jesus for using me in even a small way..
Now he begs me to come and take him home.. He knows there is no one else to do so. Who even would consider doing so... Yet his son who manages his vast holdings is not real keen on the idea of me being there... Out of fear I might get some of his inheritance and also he is enjoying seeing his father be helpless and dependent on him. (certainly a love hate relationship with his father).. I witnessed to this son and the family while there and I am sure there is a tug of war going on within this son... I continue to pray for this family and their salvation and hurt relationships to be restored..
I ask that you pray with me for guidance if I am to go back to NE to love and care for this man (I do love him inspite of the age difference and his condition). Had he not had his stroke I would be there now.. But I know God had some molding and work to do on both of us... Everyday I struggle with do I go or don't I go.. If I go I will be away from my life here (though it is one of struggle $$ wise but I have many friends and my children) and my grandbaby... I will be going to a place where I grew up but most everyone is gone to other places or to heaven... Caring for a stroke victim is very difficult to say the least... But is God calling me to witness to a lost family??? For people to see Jesus thru me??? I pray for wisdom...
Everyday I struggle with loneliness and fear... I do battle with the enemy on a moment by day bases... (Lynda can tell you that).. But my God is a good God and HE gives me strength and power over the enemy.. He will supply all my needs and direct my life... Somedays though the fear and anxiety seems great... I do battle daily using God's Word to come against the enemy... Daily he tries to steal business from me and render me hopeless... But I know he has to restore to me 7 fold what he steals.. I have to keep believing that... (I am sure getting tired...)
I hope your week in OK was good... And now back to your own life... Seeing Grandbabies is always wonderful but getting back to home is wonderful also...
And as I read Luke 9 this morning God showed me that I must pick up the cross and follow Him now matter where He sends me... follow Him never looking back to the side or behind... Only focused on Him and straight ahead... Sometimes He takes us down a less traveled road that the world says "Oh NO" you can't do that... That is craziness... How often we say "Yes Lord, I will follow you, but to only look back and say wait. let me do this and let me do that and then I will be there... But how many times did my own earthly father say I am going to town, to the cattle sale and am leaving now.. I didn't say hey wait while I do this or that... But I knew if I wanted to go with him I had to go right then.... And I went... Knowing that it would be a great good day!!! My heavenly father loves me so much more then even my earthly father did. So why do I say "wait... I need to do this and that"... Where He is taking me is so much more rewarding then I can even imagine... And how often and how many say just that... Wait while I do this and that... So in Chapter 10 where God says, the harvest is plentiful, but the labors are few.. Here is where we are... A decision to be made... Do I give up everything and go where He wants me (is it NE and to my friend) or do I miss God and stay here not being obedient... Do I confuse my own fears and doubts and think it really isn't God's voice I am hearing saying to go...
I have prayed for the faith of a child... I have an analitical mind and can think and tear apart things until there is nothing left... I don't want to be guilty of that...
So having read Luke 9 & 10 and am praying for God's wisdom. I ask you all to pray with me to hear God's vocie and be directed by Him only...
Thank You Lorie for being obedient and starting this study and for all who is sharing their thoughts and what God is showing them through His Word and each other...
many Blessigs and Love
Patty